Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Take my advice
Tell someone you have a problem and before you have finished talking, you get a load of unwanted opinions & advice (O & A). There are plenty of people with plenty of time and good intentions all around us. They want to guide you, influence you and coax you to lead life as per their recommendations. We see it all the time. Many of us could also be accused of this.
It is as if we are walking encyclopedias who have a solution for every situation. One golden rule about giving O & A is do not offer it unless asked. The only exception could be when dealing with our children or immediate family members. Most of the time people only want to be heard. They want a sympathetic listener not an hyper active counsellor! In fact, an advice will be considered seriously and implemented only if it is earnestly and repeatedly solicited.
The other rule is, after giving the O & A, it should be the recipient's decision on whether to act on it or not. We should not hold a grudge if the advice is ignored or not implemented. After all, it is not our life. The recipient may get multiple O & A and will have to choose based on her resources and constraints.
I would love to hear your view on this.
"Accept good advice gracefully, as long as it does not interfere with what you intend to do" – Anonymous
"When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice." - Marquis de la Grange