Recognise your enemy

"One of the most time-consuming things is to have an enemy" - E.B. White

Most of us would love to have a life without enemies. In fact, we go to great lengths to make friends and be happy. We read books on “How to win friends and influence people”. We dread the thought of having an enemy who is out to destroy our peace and success. If we were asked to think of and name our enemy, quite a few names might pop up in our minds. Some of us would go to great lengths to make a list and might even include anyone who has even slightly disagreed with us.

Not all are our enemies though. In fact, we are usually surrounded by well-wishers who wish to see us happy and fulfilled. People who criticise us are actually intending to correct us and guide us in the right path. People who punish us have similar motives. Come to think of it, every misfortune that we face is actually helping us become better human beings and more matured. Each experience is a lesson for us in our evolution process.

If that were so, do we really have any enemies? I would say that there is one enemy who is so close to us that we fail to recognise or realise him. That enemy is our own ego. Our ego is really our enemy because it is the one which makes us “difficult” people. Our ego stops us from having selfless and loving relationships. It is our ego which creates greed, envy, hatred, anger and all such negative emotions within us.

If only we realise this and shed our ego, we would be rid of the biggest enemy in our lives and progress much faster towards our goals. We would become less conscious of ourselves, less conceited, less inhibited and more positive in our lives. Recognise this and you become free!!

If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner - Nelson Mandela

Be Positive

At any and every point of time in our lives, we are faced with circumstances which have both positive and negative connotations. For example, I have just got a promotion means higher level, larger role, bigger pay (positives) and also means higher responsibilities, more work, bigger targets (not so positive).

At every given point of time, we are also faced with a mix of events some of which are happy and some not so happy. For example, I just got a new cell phone (happy) and I lost / misplaced my favourite pen (not so happy). So, life is a big mix of high & low feelings and emotions.

The moot question is - what do we focus on? If we are the proverbial optimists, we tend to see the brighter side of things almost always. If, however, we are pessimists we tend to see the half empty glass. It is true that it takes all kinds to make the world go around and it is also true that there is a place under the sun for everyone.

Yet, there is a strong case for being positive. Positive people are cheerful and spread positive energy. They make the most of every moment. Life seems so lively when we are around them. Their spirits never go down and they are always full of hope. Such people have better health and happiness quotient. They also have better relationships with others. People just love to have them around.

Being positive does not mean one should be unrealistic. It is not meant to ignore problems or issues. It is just an attitude where the solution gets precedence over the problem and mind refuses to dwell on pain. It is a mindset where one accepts unwelcome events or situations without being overwhelmed by it. It is a reflection of confidence in ones own abilities as well as faith in the Almighty.

"A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug" - Patricia Neal

"Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but by how we react to what happens, not by what life brings to us, but by the attitude we bring to life. A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events, and outcomes. It is a catalyst, a spark that creates extraordinary results."
- Anonymous